Waiting

"I wait for the LORD, my soul doth wait, and in his word do I hope.

My soul waiteth for the Lord more than they that watch for the morning: I say, more than they that watch for the morning."

Psalm 130: 5-6


A book I'm reading, called the "Busy Christian's Guide to Busyness" by Tim Chester gave me some insight of psalm 130 and of how David had a quiet and still heart amidst all the chaos and Saul pursuing after his life.

"Surely I have behaved and quieted myself, as a child that is weaned of his mother; my soul is even as a weaned child."

Psalm 131: 2

I'm learning from David. :)

Chopin

Now, I understand why Chopin used to be Joo Ye's favourite composer until Beethoven's works began to intrigue her.

We attended a Chopin celebration concert by the NAFA piano faculty (played by the lecturers of the faculty) It was quite an adventure getting there because we didn't know how to walk there from bugis mrt. Although we were armed with our maps, one printed out from the internet and the other printed on the book I received from their open house last time, our map-reading skills were poor. At least, mine was. Despite instructions from my mum beforehand, they didn't register in my head and we were lost. Time was ticking away-made shorter due to Joo Ye coming 30 mins later than meeting time but it was ok, the time allowance was still rather fine then. Well, to cut the story short, we managed to ask a lady whose destination happened to be (thank God) en route to nafa campus 1 (we were headed for campus 3), so she walked with us and gave us directions after she reached her destination. Thank God, we found campus 1, seeing familiar landmarks printed on the map (we were quite exhilarated actually, like, look! this is there, and that building is there! we're near!!!)
Rushing to campus 3, we plopped down into our seats after showing our tickets, in the nearly full hall. We sat at the 2nd row on the right hand corner of the hall. As it was free seating, those seats were not too bad except that we couldn't see the players' hands, only the full view of the black casing of the grand piano and the expressions of the players' faces. The sound was good.

We heard some of Chopin's nocturnes, ballads and marzukas being played and I enjoyed all of them. His works are really fine works with many details and extremely romantic. Exquisite. The players brought out the tone and shape of the music well at the same time, conveying the feelings of each piece. Chopin's pieces are of great depth and beautiful; melodious. I've never played his pieces before, maybe I should try... the challenging part is the romanticism in the piece.

Aside from Chopin, although I'm no fan of anime music, I happen to know of Totoro (having watched it before when I was young and also from music classmates playing the piece). I'm not addicted to it but after hearing the duet the past year quite frequently and just recently, I think I quite like it.

Wednesday

Woke up at 6 am (finally a break through from my "holiday" wake-up time which is about 9 am-10am)...well, after much persuasion. :D

It was my mum's idea to see how traffic would be if I took the bus to school along a 'crazy morning' route. I thought that her idea was great, it would definitely be a good gauge. However, as we left the house late, we couldn't catch the early bus and waited about 15 mins for the next one which didn't come. So, we decided to take the mrt instead. In total it takes about 1 hour... it's faster by bus...but along that 'crazy morning' route with jams, it may just take about the same amount of time as taking an mrt, which is more reliable because it runs on schedule and waiting for the next train doesn't take too long especially during peak period.

On the way, I was thinking how long the journey took and whether it would actually became an everyday thing... suddenly, the other school became poignantly attractive, relating to location.
Well. Well...

(Leaning) apple streusel cupcakes

Baked this batch of apple streusel cupcakes with the help of my mum. They tasted sweet and nice although the topping was too big (it's supposed to be the size of bread crumbs! ahh well, a lesson learnt for me, I need to rub the butter in faster next time so that it doesn't melt until it sticks together.) Oh... and the cupcakes were leaning and crumbly due to only a muffin tray being used without cupcake holders and they were still warm, moist and dense during removal. I guess there's also an art to removing cupcakes. :)

Wednesday

Today I visited 3 colleges. My mind is in a whirl.

Decisions to make
in yet so little time.
Foggy weather adds on to the rain.
Will the windscreen wipers wipe till its clear?

Balancing precariously,
peering about cautiously...
are there any pot holes in the road?
Do my driving skills equip me for this journey?
I need a map,
a compass.

Am I truly ready for all the mud-splattered,
grime and dirt-covered
paths?

Am I bold enough to brave the
curves of cliffs as I round
their scary turns?

Can I stand up to it?

I guess, God will be my map and compass.
He'll make sure I'm safe through all the storms,
and clean me up from all the dirt.
No matter how battered and bruised the car gets,
He'll take care that it can run smoothly,
oiling the gears regularly.

The car will never be dull,
because it's a continuous work of art
that He's working on.
Shining for His glory.

Tuesday

Give thanks to the LORD!

"In everything give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you."
1 Thessalonians 5:18

Ok, I was disappointed about not getting a single digit for my L1R5 raw score especially after seeing how well some others scored. It looks nice only after you minus points. :)
However my list of "could have done better..." can go on and on and on if I'm not grateful.
On the way back from school, I was thinking through some things to give thanks about.
So here goes:
Give thanks,

1. for ALL who have kept me in prayer, encouraged me, taught me, motivated me and pushed me.

2. to God who gave me the strength to sustain 3 weeks of papers.

3. for an A2 in English. (usually I don't get an A for English)

4. that there were no Cs nor B4s nor failures.

5. that I didn't have to use any tissue (although I brought a new packet to school)

6. for 4 distinctions

7. for surprises in grades (esp. in EL- a paper which I felt extremely nervous for and almost blanked out for paper 1)

8. for an awesome form teacher who was encouraging

9. that I can choose from a variety of courses.

10. for preparing me to receive the results.
( "Relax! God is in control," I read from a random tag lying on top of the shoe cabinet in my house. This was followed by Proverbs 3:5-6. On the reverse side, Mark 11:22-25 was written out. I can't help but marvel at the ways in which He works! )

These are just 10 things out of many other things that I want to thank God for.

Now, it's decision making time...praying for His guidance partly also because I'm not focused in what I want to do.

Then there's another music dilemma: should I take my violin exam with my piano exam this year?

Ok, I should end of with a cheerful note, God has brought me through my 'O' levels. He is in control.

Bright Lights Camp @ Changi Seaview resort

The four days at Bright Lights Camp was great and I really enjoyed the whole program. The focus of the camp was about "Seeking God." The highlight of the camp was the personal heart reflection times which involved each of us spending time with God individually for about 45 mins twice a day. (time flies when doing this and everytime I feel that it's not quite sufficient! :) honestly, this surprised me) We chose our individual spot to spend time with God and to do the worksheets given to us in our files. Each heart reflection time focused on a specific type of heart like having a prideful heart, adulterous heart, fearful heart, a murmuring heart etc. There was reading to do and lots of reflection; inner reflection of the heart. God revealed faults I had through the questions I had to answer in the worksheets and prayer. After each of us are done with our heart reflection time we report back to the where each of our small groups meet and discuss in our small groups. The group names are named after lights; there were 3 groups in all: Sparklers, Candles and Torches
My group was the Torches. The times of discussion during the small group was really nice too. Everyone shared what they've learnt and what God has revealed to them during their individual time spent with Him. We shared our own experiences relating with our weaknesses and expounded on topics and gave advice to one another. I feel that I've benefited a lot from the discussion sessions...

We also learnt about the heart.
The heart : can "speak" with us. (Psalm 4:4)
can make decisions (Psalm 10:6)
can meditate (Psalm 19:14)
chooses our way (Proverbs 16:9)
can think (Proverbs 23:7)
is deceitful (Jeremiah 17:9)
feels emotions (Psalm 33:21)

I learnt that the heart has been mentioned 400+ times in the Bible and only 10 times has it been mentioned as an organ pumping blood. Most times, the Bible talks about the heart thinking, feeling. Does scientific evidence support this? It does. We watched a documentary about people who received heart transplants. Their lifestyles have changed and resemble those of their donors. According to statistics only 5% -10% of heart transplant patients experience this. Still, it's something to think about and take the heart seriously. God has created us wonderfully. I'm still in awe at how complex the human body is. All His Work!
There was this story we read during personal heart reflection time about the heart being like a house and about the author showing Jesus the individual rooms. Each area had some things that needed to be cleared. The story allowed me to really feel how our relationship with God should be. It's important to seek Him continually. The story also mentioned about areas like reading the Word daily. (This really spoke to me and made me feel bad about the many times I had neglected the Word for something else that was trivial) Imagine this: Jesus waits for us every day for us to spend time with Him. It's like we're meeting up with a good friend. Do we give excuses or abandon our friend at the meeting place? The thought conjures up terrible feelings already. In the same way, we should 'meet' God everyday and seek Him everyday, not forgetting to spend time with Him and read His Word daily. He's always there.


I was blessed to have 3 lovely room mates in our cabin (as we call it). The fellowship we had was awesome and I was really thankful for the many times we had mini discussions we had and room devotions. At this camp, we did devotions a few times in a day, in groups and individually during free time as well as our own personal devotions that we do everyday usually at home. My room mate Amiel was especially encouraging in terms of motivating me to seek God with delight. She loves reading His Word and her discipline has had good effect on me. :) I did devotions with her as well as prayer during our free times. It was great fellowship and ignited a joy in me for spending time with the LORD. I remember she said this with a huge smile on her face to me," Isn't it fun to read God's Word? " I was humbled instantly... it was the first time I've heard from someone of her age (she was younger than me) express such enthusiasm and joy in reading His Word. (Isn't that sad? to think of so many teens who struggle to read God's Word and treat it as a chore; a bore.) I really thank God for showing me how to delight in Him and reading His Word through her.

God has taught me many things through this camp, especially in seeking Him and delighting in Him. I pray that I'll be able to focus on God and give Him priority in everything, to always remember that He is the centre on my life.

"But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you." Matthew 6:33

New Year Message

{A different walk}

That is what today's message was all about. To walk worthy of our calling, or simply to: walk the talk.
One of the verses shared by the speaker was Eph 5:16
" Redeeming the time, because the days are evil."

I was instantly reminded about the brevity of life. We are to live wisely and make the best use of time. The first message of the year started with a challenging note; to walk differently. The speaker also challenged us to share1, take5 (mins to read the bible) and touch10(people). For me, the hardest would be 'share1.' Still, it's a challenge worth taking up for God. In Sunday school we learnt about Peter who was called to be a 'fisher of men.' He left behind his fishing nets and possibly his old self to follow Jesus. Our sunday school teacher was saying about the word,"follow" having the connotation of "copying." Again, that's hard. Then again, what He did for us doesn't compare to what we have to do; follow.

Well, the tone for the year has been set. I'm still like a pot full of rough edges and probably out of shape but I pray that the Potter will mold me.

Saturday

We had dinner at a Peranakan restaurant with my grandma, 舅舅 and F. It was quite an interesting experience because the restaurant was partly like a mini museum and showcased the exquisite craftwork and beading of the Nyonyas. I like the kebaya but I think that to wear that everyday is difficult because it restricts your movement.

I baked my first 5 chocolate cupcakes of the year today. The recipe was supposed to yield 8 cupcakes but I managed to only fill 5 holders. I think the egg I used was too small as one large egg was required so it may have been too thick.

Today, my fingers didn't work during piano lesson...I'm worried. Ahh!!! More practice...I need to practice in sections and I need the patience and dilligence for that. With God, it is possible.

A New Year!

Today is the first day of the new year, 2010!
2009 has flown by surprisingly fast and has been filled with many lessons learnt, memorable moments and fun times.

We went to the T. family's place for the countdown yesterday. I was playing "Sequence" halfway during the countdown. :) I'm glad for the good time of fellowship we had with everyone. :D

For the first time, I don't have to prepare to go back to school so early... there's still January!
Meanwhile, it's practice, practice, practice for music. Well, there's also the Bright Lights camp coming up... I feel quite excited for this year and in what areas I can serve the LORD in. :)
Still, there are decisions to make...which I need direction and wisdom from God.

Yesterday I finally did a part 1 spring-cleaning of my desk and room (which I've been putting off because I was lazy.) Part 2? That would be clearing the rest of my assessment books, files, etc and moving them to my bro's shelf, which is currently also quite filled. :)

To start off the new year, I had a trim, which lightened the load from my head... :D and claypot chicken rice for lunch.

2010 is another new year and I don't know what to expect because I don't... only God knows. :D
I'm thankful that He has brought me through 2009 and to this new year.

There's this song that goes:

Count your blessings name them one by one,
count your blessings, see what God has done.
Count your blessings, name them one by one,
count your many blessings see what God has done.

... I'm not sure if I've gotten the lyrics right because we haven't sung this in a long while in church. I was reminded to count my blessings as I was clearing my desk and was reading through some notes of encouragement written in 2009 which really brightened my day especially when I felt stressed during the school year.

The Youth thanksgiving dinner we had recently was a time we thanked our Sunday School teachers and youth leaders. Indeed, they have been an inspiration and example for us to follow. :)